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Manage Your Freelance Writing Career While Writing What You Love

How to Know If Having An Accountability Partner Will Work for Your Writing Goals

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First things first: What’s an accountability partner?

Chances are you know exactly what this term means, but let’s define it anyway.

An accountability partner is someone who holds you accountable for reaching your goals.

Do you want to publish 2 novels this year? Do you intend to write 1000 words every day? Do you need to send 50 pitches every day? Or maybe, you have a problem with marketing, and your need someone to help you on the right track.

Whatever you need to accomplish in your writing (or non-writing life), an accountability partner might help you reach those goals.

Why did I say might?

Because not everyone needs an accountability partner. And not everyone will benefit from an accountability partner.

Could you benefit from an accountability partner?

To determine this, you need to examine your personality type when it comes to habits. And as it’s my favorite book on habits, I’ll refer to Gretchen Rubin’s book Better Than Before (aff.link) again.

Maybe my favorite book ever on habits, Rubin’s book takes personality into account.

In the book, Gretchen talks about four types of personality: Upholder, Obliger, Questioner, and Rebel.

Upholders tend to meet both inner and outer expectations while obligers are more likely to meet outer expectations. Questioners will question whether something is necessary and useful, while Rebels will resist both inner and outer expectations.

How do you know which group you belong to? It’s easy. Do you set goals for yourself and then stick to them without much friction and don’t need an outside party to check on you? You’re an Upholder. An accountability partner might work for you, but there is a chance you won’t need one.

If you are someone who only meets let’s say fitness goals under the watchful eye of a trainer or the insistence of a friend, then you are an Obliger, and you’ll most definitely benefit from an accountability partner.

Questioners will need to be persuaded about the need for an accountability partner, so if you are constantly questioning things, you might do better with a trial run. See if this works for you.

Rebels…well, rebels will fight you and themselves on all expectations, so an accountability partner might not work.

I’m a Rebel/Questioner. Most people fall into more than one category, and your type can change depending on the subject matter at hand.

Do I have an accountability partner? Well, yes and no. I have close writer friends and we constantly check up on each other. It’s not however about keeping each other accountable, but rather feeling motivated, inspired, seen, and understood.

One of my closest writer friends is Olga Mecking, the author of Niksen: Embracing the Dutch Art of Doing Nothing (aff.link). Olga is a successful freelance writer, journalist, author, and novelist. She is also married with three kids, lives in the Netherlands as an expat, and has several health issues.

So we celebrate each other on successes and productive days, while also helping one another embrace the not-so-productive ones.

Some days are just 0-word days and it is okay. Some days are 500- word days and a few are 5,000. Having someone always asking me about daily word counts would just give me anxiety, and that just doesn’t work.

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For more and better information on these personality types and how to form and keep the habits you want, I strongly recommend you read Rubin’s Better Than Before. She also wrote a whole book on these personality types alone: The Four Tendencies.

 

Do you have what it takes to be an accountability partner?

I honestly believe anyone can be an accountability partner, as long as you are both clear on what to expect from each other, and how to deliver it.

But I suspect a Rebel and an Upholder would probably not be a match made in heaven, though you’d have to test this yourself.

The takeaway  

– Not everyone needs an accountability partner.

– You can and should define the relationship with your accountability partner, should you decide to have fun.

– Having writer friends you talk to regularly about anything and everything can work much better for you than simply having someone checking up on your goals.

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What about you? Do you have an accountability partner? What strategies and tips do you have for accomplishing your goals?

 

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8 Reasons I Procrastinate and How I Make Procrastination Work for Me

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One of the most common (and generally sound) writing advice is to write with your audience in mind. What’s their pain point? And how can you fix their problem?

Except, I sometimes do things the other way on my blog. I take my pain point and write it in a way that will relate to my audience.

This usually happens when I keep reading articles that are supposedly targeted toward me but I can’t relate to at all. And I’m not a unicorn. Chances are, there are writers who will relate to me.

So I hope this procrastination article speaks to you and that you find it relatable.

As for fixing the problem of procrastination, well… we’ll see.

Fear of what now?

The reason blamed most for procrastination is usually a tie between fear of success and perfectionism.

And when that happens, I usually stop reading whatever that is.

Because I don’t know about you, but I’m not afraid of success. Failure? Oh, yes. Absolutely. Very often. Success? No.

And I’m so not a perfectionist.

I’m by no means a perfectionist.

Sure, I like to check things. I like it when things are done right.

But I never aim for perfect. I aim for grammatically correct (as long as it doesn’t stifle style and voice), factually correct and enjoyable.

Because perfect doesn’t exist. Universally loved and accepted doesn’t exist either. So, why bother? I get that it might be the reason behind the procrastination of some writers. Just not mine.

So why do I procrastinate?

– Overwhelm (also known as overload). Whether it is due to too much information, too many ideas or specific difficulties like monetary or technical, overwhelm blocks me. It renders me frustrated.

– Underwhelm. Something is boring, repetitive and/or takes too long to get to the point. Sometimes it can be hard to figure out whether you are overwhelmed or underwhelmed. The line is thin.   

– Writer’s block. How do you pitch something or write when you’re absolutely stuck?

I regularly go through what I call pitching blocks. Yes, I need to pitch guest posts to promote my novels.

And I need to pitch non-fiction article or essay ideas to editors.

But sometimes, the idea is just not there. Or the idea is there, but you can’t find a publication that is a good fit.

Sometimes you get over that hurdle, only to be rejected by the editor. Then it’s back to the drawing board.

I am often working on more than one thing, so complete writer’s block is not a thing for me.

Stuck in one scene? I move on to another. Stuck in one story? Go ahead and work on the other one. Not feeling the fiction muses? I’ll go ahead and write that blog post.

But no matter what form and magnitude writer’s block hits you, it still gets in your way.

It delays your launch plans. It might put a dent in your expected income. It will also occasionally drive you crazy.

Why can’t I find the right, exciting love story for this wonderful character of mine?

Why do I have the perfect premise for a sci-fi thriller but I can’t for the life of me figure out the personalities of my protagonists?

And why can’t I figure out the rules of this alternate universe?

– Fear of failure. Will this (whatever it is that you are learning or working on) be too hard to figure out?

Will the result have too many mistakes and/or look hideous (especially for techie things and/or things that require formatting/design)?

– Health problems. Good luck being proactive and productive when your health is bothering you a great deal.

Sure, conventional wisdom tells you to rest and sit it out, but what if your issues are chronic and the doctors haven’t figured out a solution yet? Just how much rest can you afford without going crazy and/or broke?

– Fun/being social. Yes, I admit binging Netflix too many times. Luckily, I turn that into content.

And what is sitting with friends for an hour longer? Although, if I knew Covid would hit, I would have procrastinated even harder on this front.

– Fear of failure/rejection.

I’ve been pitching for over a decade, and I still occasionally procrastinate on this.

I also call it “fear of more (unpaid) work”.

Because, if the editor rejects you, you have to look into other magazines and do more research and tweak your pitch. Then wait. Then follow up. Then maybe follow up once more before moving on. Rinse and repeat.

And if one novel doesn’t turn into the hit you are hoping for, you have to reconsider your entire marketing strategy, study some more, and gasp!, write another book – while dealing with fear and anxiety. What if this one also doesn’t work out the way I want it to work out?

Fear of more, endless, (initially) unpaid work in sight is real.

I don’t mind the work; it’s the uncertainty that gets to me. The feeling of working as hard as you can and still feeling you are not getting anywhere.

– Being intrigued by how the human mind works and how/why everyone does things. Have you ever watched videos of apartment rentals in New York even though you don’t live in the States and aren’t planning to move there anytime soon? I have.

For me, the peak of this type of procrastination is watching videos or reading about why people procrastinate. Like, I know why I do it. Why do other people? How? How often? How normal/rare/weird am I?

If this is you, you just might enjoy this Ted talk. It’s called Inside the mind of the Procrastinator.

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Procrastination isn’t the end of the world. Or the end of productivity.

I’ve never missed a deadline imposed by an editor or client, including when they asked me to set the deadline. It is only right and professional to turn in my work when or before I promised I would.

Can/do I perform the same level of “professional” courtesy if I set the deadline for myself for a passion project? I think you know the answer to that one. (No, I can’t.)

Part of the reason is, I believe, my personality. I strongly recommend Gretchen Rubin’s bestselling book Better than Before (Amazon aff. link) about habits, one of the only books I’ve read on the topic that takes your personality into account before drawing conclusions and offering advice.

I’m a questioner/rebel (terms coined by Rubin). I question everything, and I only do things if I’m satisfied by the reason. I also rebel. I do something only if I want to do it. So even if I happen to set a deadline, I would rebel against me.

Does it mean I don’t get things done?

Of course not. But it is unlikely for me to say “I’ll finish this book by March 15” and then have it finished by March. I will do it as soon as possible, but I can’t give a date. And if I did, I wouldn’t stick to it.  I’d probably finish it even on the 14th or the 16th of March just to spite my goal-setting self.

I’m trying to tone down the Questioner/Rebel in me, and luckily, I’m a total obliger when it comes to dealing with other professionals.

I’m trying to understand why I procrastinate and come up with methods to tone it down. And when I can’t tone it down, I come up with reasons to make it pay.

Make your procrastination work for you

– Watched too many episodes in a row? I pitch and write articles on it in a row while everything is still fresh in my mind.

– Spent days socializing with friends as opposed to working? I am grateful for the fun I had.

And I might or might not use the stories we shared for future inspiration. Always with their permission, of course.

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So, there you go. This has been the procrastination analysis of a non-perfectionist.

If I regret any procrastination, it’s usually the mindless social media browsing or YouTube watching before I go to bed. But even then, those are my creatively and energetically dead hours.

And let’s face it, cute cats can’t be that bad for our mental health.

Could I be working instead? If I could, trust me, I’d be working.

Could I be doing something else? If there was a way I could be out safely dancing and mingling outside, I’d be doing that.

As long as I don’t hang around online past midnight (which is the latest I can go to bed where my brain and body will allow me to wake up properly in the morning), I’ll be fine.

And in those “mindless” strolling moments, I’ll still find hilarious memes, story ideas, what I want from a rental apartment, what (not) to do with my social media, where I (don’t) want to travel, and beyond.

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Here’s what I want you to take away from this post:

– Not all procrastination is bad.

– Not everyone procrastinates the same way or for the same reasons.

– You can make procrastination work for you.

– Reading about other people’s procrastination reasons (and ways) will be helpful to a certain extent. But you might decide you have to work on it if you are filled with regret and disappointment afterward.

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Why do you procrastinate? How do you procrastinate? And what do you do about it? Let me know in the comments.

How to Work (and What Tasks to Do) When You Are Sleep Deprived

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In an ideal world, one or two things would happen:

  • We wouldn’t be sleep-deprived.
  • We wouldn’t have to work when we were sleep-deprived.

But it isn’t an ideal world, alas both situations occur quite often. If you don’t have anything urgent, it’s best putting off urgent tasks until you are rested. If you do, it might be better to try and take a nap first.

Not possible? Pour some coffee (or tea, your choice) and get to it.

Also, think of activities that make you happy, alert, and energetic. Different activities have different effects on people. Showers wake some people up while making others sleepier. (I’m in the second group.)

  • Blog maintenance. Updating plugins and themes don’t require much attention and energy. Get this sucker off your plate.
  • Marie Kondo-ing your office space. While I like Marie Kondo, I don’t recommend trying to catch the feeling of joy when it comes to organizing important stuff. Instead, go for the thought of useful and/or new information. I don’t want you to end up fileless and freaking about not being able to find important story drafts or reference books!
  • Marie Kondo-ing your desktop files. See the point above about joy.
  • Email checking and cleaning: unsubscribing from people you don’t like. Sometimes, I go on a binge email unsubscribing spree. I might even unsubscribe if I am a huge fan of the person. Because I am a huge fan, I don’t need a daily or weekly reminder to check out their new post or product. I already have. So I remain subscribed to newsletters that share stuff that is not on their website, or newsletters that are so useful that I cannot afford not being updated. And sometimes, I remain subscribed because while I am a fan, I often forget to check out their latest work because I’m only human and I don’t remember to regularly read every blog I enjoy. What makes a newsletter worth subscribing to and remain on their email list? Check out my article Newsletter Writing 101: The Dos and Don’ts.
  • Drafting posts. Funnily enough, you can actually write even if you are tired. It might not be a masterpiece, and you probably shouldn’t be working on the polished version your editor will read. Drooping eyes miss more errors. But if you are in the zone, you are in the zone. If your health allows it, don’t let your energy level trick you into not writing.
  • Noting down ideas. Your brain might be too tired to do certain things, but ideas also don’t give two hoots about how you feel. If they want to arrive, they will. So you better not let them go. You might not remember them later.
  • Free-writing. What better excuse to write without limits and rules? Just let your subconscious take over.
  • Collecting scattered ideas in two places: one digital and one physical – and then backing them up. Be honest with me. How many idea files and notebooks do you have? Even the most organized of us can fall prey to buying too many notebooks or creating too many files to save our ideas. It doesn’t take too much mental effort to copy paste with your mouse or with your hand, so take advantage of these “tired” times to gather your ideas in one place. Then make several copies. You can never be too careful or safe when you are saving and recording your ideas. The idea is to have all the ideas in one place, and copies of the big list. Not 500 different files with different ideas. Think about your scattered notes the next time you think you don’t have something to pitch or write about. You should do the same with the writing markets, while you are at it.
  • Going over your to-do lists and goal sheets. If you’ve been meaning to do something for months, just go ahead and do it. It is okay to change your mind and delete the task if you feel it was unnecessary. But if you neglected something essential, it is time you prioritize it.
  • Responding to emails. Try not to make too many typos, especially if you are corresponding with editors and clients. But let’s face it, most email communication is about you confirming things or following up on them. Do those.
  • Backing-up your work and research. All you need to do is to get them on to Cloud, a hard drive, a USB or emailing them to yourself. Better to be safe than sorry.
  • Social media posting. Afraid people forgot who you are? Start reminding them. Hanging out at social media is a better way to spend your time when you are tired. Just don’t post something embarrassing you can’t take back. Unless embarrassing is your brand. Then by all means, go all for it!
  • Profile updates. You have a new book out? Published on some amazing pubs? Time to polish those clips and social media profiles.
  • Bookmark and reading list cleaning. No need to keep useless stuff around. Read and decide what to discard.
  • Reading stuff that doesn’t hurt your brain. It can be reading for fun – since you are a writer, reading is always a part of your job. I know, we are so lucky! But we’ve all been there. Sometimes we can’t just bare to process overly technical stuff or brand new information. Ignore those and come back when you are feeling alert and capable.
  • Watching things that are necessary for your idea-collecting, craft-building and relaxing. Bonus points if they help with all three. Watching Netflix is a part of my job. So no one pays me just to watch something, but a lot of my ideas and stories have ties to pop culture. So watching movies and series help me grow as a writer, while also fueling my creative juices. So when in doubt and too tired to do anything else, go watch something.

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There you go, those were my humble suggestions. Let me know how you deal with work when you are sleep-deprived or sick. They often attack together!

Related posts you can check out:

A Love Letter to All Freelancers With a Health Condition

How to Get Back to Work After Vacation (Even If You Are Exhausted)

Sleepy Writer’s Wake-up Ritual: How to Start A Writing Day Well

Benefits of Having a Cold for Freelance Writers

9 Productive Things Writers Can Do When They Have a Cold

 

 

January – First Three Weeks: Resolutions Success Breakdown, and Self-Publishing News

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2017’s last post was aptly about resolutions. I’m here to hold myself (and you) accountable for resolutions. You can refresh your memory here: The 2018 Goals Post: Here’s to a Productive and All-Around Kick-Ass Year.

The post basically talked about goals in the areas of health and fitness, networking and socializing, organizing, and writing.

Health and fitness: I bought myself a cheap smartwatch, but I’m using it as a fitness tracker- I got it because it is hard to track your steps with a phone all the time, and seeing the number motivates me to walk more.

Still trying to figure out how certain functions work.

I’m aware the total number might be more than about 1000 than my actual number since it is on my wrist, and I move my hands a lot more than my feet. But I try to take it off if I’m sitting and writing a lot, and I consider how inactive/active I have been when noting the final number. Still, I’m happy to say it serves its purpose. I’m moving more. Can’t disappoint the watch, can you? Also, it is pink and really fun to look at.

Writing: I didn’t write any pages for the works in progress I talked about in my previous post. However I decided to self-publish my novel Making A Difference (M.A.D.). It is a small step for humanity, but a gigantic one for this writer. I’ve had the concept for so long. The only way to get closure on this story was to share it with the world. I’ll share the details on when it will be published, so keep an eye out. I’ll say this: I can promise a fun time for romantic comedy lovers.

Not the actual cover. Currently working with a designer to capture the tone and atmosphere of the story better. 🙂 This is me, learning and experimenting with design.

Networking and socializing: I’m afraid I’m failing in this department this month. I haven’t met anyone new except for online, but 3 weeks wasn’t enough time to get all my work done. I’m hoping to be more productive on this front from February and onward.

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How are you faring compared to your resolutions? Share away in the comments.

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