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How to Evaluate Your Script Evaluations: My Post on Bang2Write

Posted on June 17, 2015 Written by Pinar Tarhan

In an ideal (and lucky world), your script evaluations would all be positive, and you could start worrying about your pitch after you got your consider or even better, recommend.

But more often than not, you’ll either get a pass or consider with reservations despite your best editing efforts. And different script readers will disagree on pretty much anything.

So you won’t be able to jumpstart editing before deciphering what everyone means, and whether you should consider every tip.

I’m happy to announce that my tips on the subject was published on Lucy V Hay’s Bang2write, a blog I religiously follow.:)

You can click to title to read the article there: 5 Ways To Evaluate Your Feedback by Pinar Tahan aka @zoeyclark

Happy Evaluating!

The Biggest Dialogue-Related Challenge in Screenwriting

Posted on May 10, 2015 Written by Pinar Tarhan

“Good dialogue clearly conveys emotions, attitudes, strengths, vulnerabilities, and so on, while revealing the details of your plot and advancing your narrative.”

Susan Kouguell, from her article Tips on Writing Dialogue That’s Truthful.

Dialogue is one of the hardest parts of screenwriting. Just look at its functions perfectly stated by Susan Kouguell. Good dialogue needs to do all that.

And what does good dialogue mean?

Good dialogue flows.

One way to assure that is by not writing on-the-nose dialogue.

But if it’s never on-the-nose, then you’ll also bore your audience to tears or annoy the hell out of them.

Think about five characters who never ever say what they mean and never mean what they say for 90+ pages. Frankly, I’d end up wanting to strangle them. There have been many movies where I hated the characters for this reason.

However if it’s always on the nose, then you’re destroying your chances for conflict. Also a no-no. It’s a hard balance to strike.

Thanks to some great feedback, I (mostly) dealt with my tendencies to write on-the-nose dialogue. In my defense, I don’t want to eliminate it completely because it’s not realistic then either.

Because people who do mean what they say and say what they mean, at least more than half their lives exist. Exhibit A: Me. I might have to get a little diplomatic or more polite depending on the situation, but if something is wrong, I never, ever say “nothing.” And if I’m upset or not happy about something, I never say “whatever.” Yeah, I’m weird like that.

It needs to be fresh. Witty is great too, if you can pull it off (and it fits the mood).

You can’t write a page-turner by putting the same old clichés everywhere. But then again, it should also sound natural.

All the freshness and wittiness in the world can’t save your script if your character doesn’t sound like an actual person. (If it’s not an actual person, say a robot, an alien from another galaxy or some other special circumstance, never mind.)

And perhaps most importantly, your characters should sound distinctive.

Now, it makes sense. Because in reality, we all have unique speech patterns, our preferred catch phrases, speed, ….. The list goes on.

That said, I’ve always found it easier to “separate” the voices for people who are from different backgrounds. Because the more different they are, the easier it’s to write lines that sound unique to that person.

Think about Pirates of the Caribbean, for starters.

Jack Sparrow: pirate, eccentric, (a little) nutty, morally ambiguous, witty, male.

Elizabeth: a young lady with a free spirit. She’s also well-educated and brave.

Norrington: soldier, by the book, with a distaste for outlaws, not usually able or willing to think outside the box.

How hard can it be to write their lines (and how they speak those lines) so that they are distinct? Making the lines funny and/or smart enough can be the challenge here. But differentiating characters’ way of speaking? Not so much.

The Biggest Dialogue-Writing Challenge in Screenwriting

So what is, at least for me, more difficult than writing dialogue that’s not on-the-nose, fresh and that hopefully flows?

Making my characters sound distinctive, when their backgrounds and life expectations aren’t so different.

What if your story has to have characters of the same background, identifying with the same culture, who are from the same part of the city, who are of the same sex and age?

When writing dialogue for such characters, I rely on their actions and how they respond to situations. I take advantage of their favorite words/catch , how often they swear (or not) and their personalities.

But what I often find, just not within my own dialogue but within others’ as well, is that I can identify characters according to what they say and their actions, rather than how they say their lines.

As I work on my skills to create more distinguishable dialogue, I asked some of my fiction writer friends how they handle this. Their responses are below:

Glenn Hefley:

“Physical actions are good. I like those more than catch phrases — not sure the preference of my readers, but I like them more. Having one start, then stop and think, then finish in a different direction is my favorite separator – equal to the guy who doesn’t reply for longer than is comfortable.”

Gretchen Mure Rodriguez:

“People tend to use certain words (slang or otherwise) more than others or have quirky habits- how they stand, twirl their hair etc.”

Anna Marie Spackman:

“I always think of motivation. My best friend and I may sound similar or say similar things, but we are motivated by different things, so the way we respond to a given situation will be different.”

***

We started with a quote from Susan Kouguell, so let’s end with one from her.

“Readers should be able to identify who is speaking without needing to read each character heading. Characters’ voices must be distinctive and not interchangeable with other characters.”

Susan Kouguell, from her article Tips on Writing Dialogue That’s Truthful.

Yep, no one said being a screenwriter is easy. How do you handle your dialogue? How do you ensure your characters’ voices are distinctive?

Must-Read Helpful Articles on Dialogue

Column D: Writing Dialogue -The Nose Knows by Drew Yanno

6 Reasons Dialogue Is Your Enemy by Lucy V Hay

Tips on Writing Dialogue That’s Truthful by Susan Kouguell

Dialogue Is The Least Of My Problems by Lucy V Hay

Wendy’s LA4HIRE: Best Screenwriting Tips for Great Dialogue by Wendy Kram

More Than Words: Screenplay Dialogue by Lucy V Hay

Script Mistake # 4: Fatty Dialogue by Lucy V Hay

Screenwriting Problems Tackled: When No One Likes Your Main Character

Posted on February 12, 2015 Written by Pinar Tarhan

nightcrawler-poster — Did someone say an unlikable protagonist? Image via ropeofsilicon.com.

I’ve previously posted The 7 Challenges of Writing a Screenplay, and I’m proud to say I’ve tackled a lot of them successfully in my rewrites. Length is no longer a problem, and having gotten rid of a lot of exposition, my screenplay is a lot leaner.

Right now, I’m facing another problem: I have two protagonists, and one of them is deemed unlikable by half the people (professionals and friends) who read my screenplay. The good news is, some of the “dislikers” are happy with how interesting the events and pacing are, and have told me they don’t have to like a character to enjoy a story or movie.

Why can one main character be unlikable?

My character comes off as too selfish, and that makes it hard for the audience to root for him. He also doesn’t lose everything despite everything he does.

Except, he is not the only main character. His problems and behavior are central to the story, yes, but it’s a script with two protagonists: these two characters start the story as best friends, but extreme circumstances force them to be each other’s antagonist.

And the second protagonist couldn’t be more likeable. He’s strong, passionate, flawed, loyal to a fault… Yet no one seems to notice.

Yes, there are changes I can make to make the unlikeable guy more likable, but most positive changes would change the heart of the story, and I can’t allow that. Because you see, this is the story I want to tell.

When you understand that character, and he is not unlikable to you

And it’s hard for me to see the character as completely selfish, because history (meaning his back story) has proven him to be pretty selfless, or close to it, in the past. He is just having a major crisis, with a pretty debilitating problem, and is acting irrationally. This in turn suggests another problem: plausibility. Like most screenplays, mine requires a decent amount of suspension of disbelief. Not because the events couldn’t/wouldn’t happen, but they are a bit on the extreme side. But if they weren’t, the story I wanted to tell wouldn’t exist.

That’s not to say I don’t respect my readers’ feedback. I do. My last coverage evoked some great questions, and I’d love to discuss it with the reader. I just need to adjust my budget first for further consultation.

On the other hand, one professional reader not only liked this “unlikable” dude, but named him his favorite.

And I’ve just finished watching two webinars from Writer’s Store where industry experts (including Script Mag’s Jeanne Veillette Bowerman) emphasized that you can root for a character if he’s interesting enough, even if he’s evil. One given example was Hannibal Lecter. (In her webinar Creating Dynamic Characters.)

Now, I’m in no way claiming my character is that interesting (completely different genres for one. For two, my character won’t be portrayed by Anthony Hopkins:D) But in a way, my “selfish protagonist”, is the antagonist of the story in several ways.

If audiences can root for Hannibal or the killer in Se7en, they can tolerate my selfish character. Next to them, he comes off like a newborn kitten for crying out loud!

Good news: There Are Many Successful Movies with Unlikeable Protagonists

Let’s mention some recent successful movies with borderline horrible, obnoxious main characters. Please note I might spoil the movies a little.

Gone Girl: I seriously can’t decide whose character I detest more. Ben Affleck’s or Rosamund Pike’s? And it’s not like supporting characters are sweet either. Engaging movie (for the most part), great second act but come on! I’ve never spent so much time during a movie wanting to punch all the characters. I wouldn’t want them as my neighbors, friends, distant acquaintances…The cops in the film included.

Side Effects: Sure, Jude Law’s character becomes more and more likable as the story progresses, but what about Rooney Mara’s? And I definitely lost a little respect for Law’s character when he got back with his wife, no questions asked. After the way she treated him? Come on! I don’t need a long fight scene, but just give me a sign of difficulty for crying out loud!

Nightcrawler: Different and compelling movie, sure. But Louis Bloom has to be one of the most obnoxious protagonists ever written. Louis Litt from the TV series Suits is a selfless angel compared to Bloom. Seriously!

And we are never given a back story on why he is such a sociopathic prick. Actually Nightcrawler steps on and chews out so much renowned screenwriting advice, it will get its own post. (or at least another post.) The point is, the only thing I liked about that character was that it was played by Jake Gyllenhaal. I didn’t root for him. I didn’t respect his cunning. I think the fact that he’s so unlikable, and still gets what he wants (despite not being as slick and smart as he believes) is what makes the movie fun to watch.

What does this mean for you and your story?

I haven’t sold this story (with the selfish protagonist) yet. I may never be able to sell it. Maybe it’ll be optioned and/or bought and never made. Maybe I will have to wait until I have the resources to make it myself. Like all the screenplays out there, the possibilities are just too many to count.

The point is, I’m not giving up on it. It has its strengths, and it has its weaknesses, and I’m doing my best to eliminate the weak parts. I’ll do my best to sell it afterwards. But I believe in it, and I’m not giving up on it. I’m also determined to improve it without changing the core.

You might need to adapt too, but you also need to keep believing in yourself. I watched this wonderfully helpful webinar by Marilyn Horowitz (How to Sell Your Screenplay in 30 Days Using New Media through Writer’s Store) where she reminds you that you need to be your biggest fan. You need to be professional, yes, but you also need to believe. It has to be the kind of story you would pay to see. If you wouldn’t, why write it?

Write the kind of movie you’ll want to see. Be as objective as you can. Improve it as much as you can. Then start pitching and querying.

And good luck!

The Elusive Craft of Writing Better Screenplay Dialogue & Useful Resources to Improve Yours

Posted on June 18, 2014 Written by Pinar Tarhan

jack nicholson, a few good men — Famous line from A Few Good Men starring Tom Cruise and Jack Nicholson. Written by Aaron Sorkin. Image via whatascript.com

Actor/director/screenwriter Ethan Hawke (Before Sunrise series, Training Day, Dead Poets Society) is quoted to have said dialogue writing is easy; you just have to be honest. While I agree with Hawke that honesty is a must, I don’t necessarily think it makes your job a breeze.

You see, I’m honest to the core when I’m writing a screenplay. I try to keep my characters honest too (as long as they are not delusional, dishonest or just plain evil in nature). And this sometimes causes problems. For instance my dilaogue can be viewed as lacking subtext, and my characters being too precise at expressing themselves.

While I appreciate the importance of subtext, especially when it’s needed to create tension and/or mystery, I’m not a big fan of characters being vague, evasive, or sarcastic just because. Is it wrong to have characters that aren’t afraid of speaking their minds, or characters that are just forthright during their emotional outbursts?

Yes, not all people are like that. But not all people (or great characters) are evasive. I just try to do what works for my story. (It’s not to say upon a reviewing of my script I didn’t make add more subtext, I did.)

But while screenwriting has many, many delightful moments, it also has excruciating ones. I’d love to pick Hawke’s brain on how he made his process so smooth, as I mostly love the writing he does.

And since honesty doesn’t do the trick alone, let’s get some more help on how to write terrific dialogue from the articles below:

How to Win BlueCat by Gordy Hoffman

Gordy Hoffman, who is a screenwriter/screenwriting consultant and the founder of BlueCat Screenplay Writing competition, offers tips that work not just on a competition level. They also serve as great guidelines to edit/rewrite your entire screenplay.

His tips include getting rid of bad jokes, unnecessary/flowery description, making your script as tight (and as short) as possible, rereading and more.

Gordy Hoffman’s screenwriting credits include Love Liza, an offbeat drama comedy starring Philip Seymour Hoffman.

*Note on BlueCat: BlueCat offers something more than your typical contest: written feedback on every submitted script. And if you get to submit before a certain deadline, you can resubmit your edited screenplay. You need to pay for the resubmission, but it’s still a great way to improve your writing, as well as your chances to win.

You can of course disagree with the comments, and choose not to resubmit.

I’ve entered with a feature drama script, after editing an already edited version. This new version is 7 pages shorter, has more subtext and is much tighter. I’m looking forward to the feedback. We’ll see whether I’ll resubmit afterwards.

The Heart and Soul of Screenwriting: Writing Good Dialogue and Description

Also penned by Gordy Hoffman, this article reminds you that you’re writing a screenplay, and not a novel. If you’ve gotten used to killing your darlings in your writing, it’s good news. Because you’ll be killing more darlings than ever.

It also reminds you of the required balance between dialogue and description. You shouldn’t have too much of either. Of course while some screenplays can be exceptions, yours might not necessarily be one of them.

So basically, be coherent and succinct. Give it your best shot. And don’t forget to read the entire article.

SCREENWRITING TIPS FROM A SCREENPLAY CONTEST JUDGE

A judge of the BlueCat contest offers tips that will be useful for getting better contest results. But applying these will make your script more marketable.

Yes, it warns you against typos and grammar mistakes, and doesn’t diverge from Hoffman’s views on dialogue and description. But it also offers some great guidelines when it comes to exposition, using your imagination and more.

How To Write Screenplay Dialogue by Rob Tobin

Rob Tobin is a script reader, doctor and exec who has gone over thousands of scripts.

I love this article because he believes great dialogue writing is a skill that can be learned and improved. He makes his case through a movie that won the Oscar for Best Screenwriting in 1998: Good Will Hunting.

Written by Matt Damon and Ben Affleck, and directed by Gus Van Sant, Good Will Hunting is a delightful movie experience by itself. However, it is, as pointed out, a great screenplay to study as well.

The characters and their lines are often nothing short of brilliant. And the clip of the scene, most mentioned for masterful dialogue, is available on YouTube.

That scene is one of the most memorable scenes in the movie as the trouble-prone Will (Matt Damon) saves his best friend Chuckie (Ben Affleck) from humiliation, and potential jail time (as Chuckie would have proceeded to kick the pampered ass of the meddling Harvard student) just with his self-read and self-earned wisdom and education. This scores him the phone number of one of the girls Chuckie was trying to impress, the satisfaction of having shoved to one obnoxious character (we also cherish the feeling as the audience), as well as showing an interesting irony: Will can’t get out of trouble himself. Let’s be frank, we often crank out some wise advice, while we can’t or don’t follow it ourselves.

As Tobin suggests, it is crucial to know your characters very well. I’ll leave you with this great quote from the article:

“So you want brilliant dialogue? Make it the only dialogue your character can possibly say given who he or she is, where he or she is, and to whom he or she is saying it.”