Addicted to Writing

Manage Your Freelance Writing Career While Writing What You Love

7 Things to Never Say to or Ask a Writer

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This writer was probably asked/told one of these things before this picture was taken. 🙂

While this post targets the non-writers in our lives, I thought it’d be a fun read, and one you can just save and show whenever weird or unwelcome questions about writing bother you. 🙂

And if you have anything to add, please do so in the comments!

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There is a rare breed of writers who have thick skin. They never get offended, annoyed, or upset. The unluckier but more common group, however, just learn to deal with these emotions. We develop ways to remain professional and calm while dealing with the turmoil inside.

Then we probably create a fictional character inspired by you and make sure that character gets what’s coming to them. Hey, it is fiction. Anything is allowed.

Look, we get it. We are in a weird profession. Many of the curious folk who utter these words mean well. They either want to find out more or don’t want us to suffer any more than we already do. But they inadvertently get under our skin.

Because despite all the love, passion, fun, entertainment, and satisfaction writing fills us with, we manage a lot of unpredictability, instability, rejection, fear, creative blocks and anger (and then some!) on a daily basis. So we don’t need any more negativity from other sources, especially if those sources are family and friends.

It is an easy list. Go ahead, internalize it. The writers in your life will love you more for it.

  • Get a real/another job.

Fun fact: we actually like money.

We don’t need to be rolling in it to feel happy or complete, but we recognize it as a necessary tool to survive and thrive in the world. We don’t need yachts, extra homes, or opulence (I’m not saying we object to those things. I’m just pointing out that we don’t need them), but we do need health insurance, food, shelter, some savings, and a bit more dough for the little social things that make life a bit more enjoyable: like the occasional meal out, seeing our favorite actors on the big screen, or going on a short vacation.

So if our writing isn’t bringing us enough money for the time period, we will get a job. Math might not be our favorite subject in the world, but we get the equation involving expenses and money earned.

Exceptions, of course, do exist. If we trust your judgment and ideas, we might ask you to brainstorm with us on ways we can get a better job or make more money. Then, please, share your ideas away. We asked for it.

  • Aren’t you wasting your education/training/intelligence/skills/previous job experience?

What we studied in school, whatever jobs we held don’t matter in the slightest if that is not the area we want to work in.

It doesn’t matter that we busted our asses getting into college to study law/medicine/engineering/business/advertising/whatever. If we wanted to work in these areas, we would. (Some of us are, but hey, you wouldn’t be asking them this question.)

We spend 1/3 of our lives at work. Imagine that. Why would you want or expect us to do anything other than we love?

Maybe we studied something for years before we realized it wasn’t for us. It’d be depressing to see that as wasted time. Instead, we learned a lot about something and moved on.

Did you know that Dave Evans, the co-author of the New York Times best-selling book Designing Your Life: Build the Perfect Career, Step by Step (aff. link)  who is a designer and a design professor, first intended to be a marine biologist? As a fan of the book, I for one am glad he carved a different path. (And he carved it because he discovered he didn’t enjoy being a biologist.)

Maybe we are writing about the areas we studied in. We are creating characters who work in those industries or penning non-fiction pieces we managed to get from editors – you guessed it – by mentioning our education and any work experience.

When I’m not writing, I can be found teaching English to adults. When I teach Business English, unlike a lot of teachers, I don’t have to spend hours familiarizing myself with the jargon or finding interesting industry examples to help them learn better. Why? Because I did study business and advertising in college. I didn’t get a job in advertising because I don’t enjoy it. I do. That’s why I studied it. I just don’t love it enough to dedicate 1/3 of my life to it.

  • So is John Grisham/Stephen King/J.K. Rowling on your speed dial?

This might be just about me.

Sorry to disappoint you, but I don’t know any famous writers. Although I know a plethora of authors, none of them are household names yet. But fingers crossed, one day they will be. They deserve it.

  • Can you make money writing/Do you make money?

Yes, you can make money writing.

Did you know I once got $400 for expressing my opinion? While there is a lot more to writing an op-ed than  just telling people what I think, it doesn’t change the fact that there is money in a writing career.

When you can sell many copies of your books, you also make money. If you option or sell your script, you make money.

But do people regularly ask you your salary? Why are you so concerned with ours?

  • How do you make money?

OK, actually this question is allowed if we have entered an interesting conversation about the nuts and bolts of how a writing career works. You are also allowed to ask it if you are a budding writer who wants to learn or another experienced writer who wants to compare notes.

You are not allowed to ask it, however, in a condescending, shocked, or worried tone.

Yes, we make money. But we would also keep writing if we weren’t. That doesn’t give anyone the right not to pay us what we deserve. It just means that we feel compelled to share our written words with the outside world.

When I was in high school, I created a romantic comedy TV-series. I wrote it in screenplay format, printed out, and handed interested friends the episodes in order. We talked about their favorite events and characters, what they hoped would happen, what worked well and what didn’t.

I learned a lot, but I also had so much fun. I didn’t make a dime, but I got read. It was glorious.

Because I am a writer. I write.

  • How will you retire?

We won’t! I mean we save money for emergencies and contingencies, but we won’t quit if we can help it. That is the whole point. For us, it is not just a job or career. It is a calling. It is a part of us. We are always filled with stories.

  • What do you write?

How much time have you got?

Technically, there is nothing wrong with it if you ask a writer who only writes in one genre or niche, but most writers won’t a short answer.

Unless you are an agent, manager, editor, or a producer, you won’t get an “elevator” version.

My short answer is: Screenplays, novels, and non-fiction.

Longer answer: I write romantic comedies and dramas. With non-fiction, I generally cover lifestyle topics in essays, blog posts, articles, or op-eds. It is a shorter list if I go over what I don’t write about than what I do.

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Don’t get us wrong. We like it when people are interested in us and in our work. We don’t mind questions that every profession begets. We are just tired of people who treat us like weird creatures living life in a fantasy bubble that don’t know how the world works.

We know exactly how the world works. That’s why so many of us became writers. To change it, enhance it, to make it better.

So the question is, will you behave, or will you become the villain in our next story?

Should You Get a Day Job Until You Make a Full-Time Living from Your Writing?

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Every once in a while, I will catch a TV series or a movie where I’ll envy the full-time jobs and careers of the characters: The offices, perks, comradery, co-workers, the regular salary, insurance, potential for office romance no matter how tricky… And I’ll be a bit sad remembering that it is probably not going to happen for me, and that is my choice.

Then I’ll also read a semi-joking tweet or sometimes even an entire essay on the harsh realities of the gig economy and will feel like crying.

Because no matter how you look at it, making a living with your writing is hard work. Making a decent, regular, and stable income with your writing is much harder.

If you are just starting out, you might be thinking “You get to work in your PJs and vacation whenever the hell you want. How are you even complaining about the hard work?”

I’m not complaining about that. Working hard is not the problem.

We love writing. Otherwise, no one in their right mind would choose to become a writer. But just because we love writing, it doesn’t mean we love writing about anything and everything. It doesn’t mean we will be good at the other parts of the job such as editing, pitching, and marketing.

Being a freelance writer often comes with a challenge: Either you take on jobs writing about subjects you don’t care about so that you will have the occasional freedom to write about the things you do love, or you write about the things you do love and have the occasional freedom to buy the things you need and want.

So we find ways to diversify our income. We take full-time, part-time or freelance jobs that might or might not be writing-related. We write books, launch blogs, create courses, learn affiliate marketing, coach, consult, and study whenever we can to improve ourselves further.

While I love the freedom of being my own boss, I struggle with all the “jobs” I have to perform to keep my dream career going. I write, edit, pitch, market, read, research, answer calls and emails, and find story ideas.

Finding story ideas often means I have to socialize, which can be hard to find the time for with so many balls I’m juggling. And I shall not spend too much money on my social life because I have to save for my future – namely retirement and a damn good insurance because life is unpredictable.

And because we are busy writing and doing all the time, we risk burning out –which makes vacations crucial to our survival. Which brings us back to money.

Not to mention, when you get sick, the whole company shuts down. Because YOU ARE THE COMPANY.

So should you get a day job while you start earning a good income from your writing? It depends.

It depends on your goals, needs, responsibilities, and health.

  • Are you an extrovert who thrives more when she regularly comes into contact with people?
  • Do you need a stable paycheck for certain expenses?
  • Are you responsible for looking after people other than yourself?
  • Are you more comfortable and creative with a safety net?

Then you might consider supporting yourself with non-freelance work.

Now, there are many freelance writers who earn a lot of money from their work every month. To get there, you need to be more strategic when it comes to identifying your prospective clients and niches. You need to pitch regularly and according to a plan. You need to market yourself where your prospective clients are.

Yes, it can be done.

But if you are more into working for yourself, calling the shots and writing about things that excite you, things get a bit more complicated. It can still be done. It will, however, likely cause more frustration and anxiety in the process.

I’m sorry to say there is no one-size-fits-all sort of answer to this complex situation. You know you better than anyone. It is up to you to weigh the pros and cons.

As for me, a part-time job at an office where the culture appeals to my personality sounds like an amazing idea. Unfortunately, I haven’t yet seen such an office in real life. Yet.

Let’s discuss how you make a living writing in the comments.

 

 

How The Movie Nerve Can Inspire You To Lead A More Exciting Life

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Nerve movie poster
Image via Collider.

Sometimes, you just feel stuck. Whether it’s being stuck in your comfort zone because of elements out of your control or failing to take risks due to practical reasons, it’s a horrible feeling. You don’t want your life to be any less exciting the movie characters’ you’re watching, though you (probably) want slightly less danger.

The fun drama thriller Nerve (2016) dares its characters to take crazy risks you’d probably never do.

A bit on Nerve starring Dave Franco and Emma Roberts

Vee (Emma Roberts) is a high school senior, a talented photographer and unwilling to take risks. She’s delayed telling her mother (Juliette Lewis) she was accepted to CalArt, partly because they’re both still recovering from the death of her older brother.

But when her popular and overtly extroverted best friend Sydney inadvertently embarrasses her to her crush, Vee decides to play Nerve, a popular interactive game where watchers pay to dare players to do all sort of things, from relatively harmless to potentially lethal. Her first dare has her kissing a stranger (Dave Franco) for 5 seconds. That cute stranger, Ian, turns out to be a Nerve player as well, and watchers love them together.

As they start taking challenges together, their attraction grows more intense. But is Ian really a great catch that’s genuinely into Vee, or does he have ulterior motives like Vee’s other best friend Tommy thinks?

Nerve is a fun ride that entertains more than makes you think

Don’t get me wrong. I loved Nerve. And it did make me think. But there is so much compelling social commentary that can be done with a PG-13 rating. And it is okay. If you want to think and get depressed about what people and technology have come to, you can always watch any Black Mirror episode. So far, I’ve watched the first season (the first 3 episodes), and I plan to skip season 2 altogether.

Nerve isn’t a depressing movie. It’s also strangely romantic, and if you take away the right lessons, it will inspire you to have a life that will give you plenty to write about.

Why This Writer Is Feeling Stuck

Now as writers, our lives are rarely devoid of drama. A lot of us are prone to mood swings even if we are not combating a mental condition. The potential economic instability (known as the feast or famine cycle) of freelancing, the hatred of our day job if we are not freelancing, the obligation to multitask and the feeling that we’re not doing enough for our careers, health problems like chronic illnesses, writing disabilities or just annoyingly weak immune systems that give us long-lasting colds every two weeks… How can we not be emotional?

How can we not get frustrated?

We all have obstacles that get in our way, some of them harder than others. And even though we know better, sometimes we say stuff like “I wish something would happen in my life already.”

Like you already haven’t endured disappointment, heartbreak, depression, illnesses, failures, rejections, grief, …. on the negative side.

Or you haven’t already experienced tremendous lust for life, exciting crushes, a thousand travel stories, unique adventures and occurrences on the positive.

Sometimes you just hit a rut. And whatever the reason, the rut feels like it has been there forever when it wasn’t just last week, or month or year.

So you start comparing yourself to the narrators of your favorite personal essays, characters from the movies and novels and TV series and maybe sometimes even your friends.

Let’s face it; you’re not in Amsterdam taking beautiful shot after beautiful shot. You’re struggling to cobble of two words or ideas together. You haven’t sold a piece in what feels like forever whereas your blogger friends seem to be at the height of their productivity and success. Their lives are filled with excitement and surprise and spontaneity.

Yours feels just…the same.

Because you forgot about that two beautiful vacations you took in the summer or the awesome musical you just saw last week. Instead of feeling like you can take over the world, you feel like the world has taken over you.

But then you stumble upon a piece of writing that speaks to you. You watch a film that motivates you. The film was Nerve.

For me, that piece of writing was my friend Olga Mecking’s blog post WHY THE BEST STORIES ARE THE WORST where she reminds us how great characters, characters we want to read about, are always in big trouble. And the great storytellers have compelling real life material they derive from.

Sure, you are looking forward to the new war thriller Allied starring Brad Pitt and Marion Cotillard, but there’s no way in hell you want to be a spy during Word War II. You may want to kiss a hot stranger for five seconds, but you’d never lead him as he sped up to 60 miles an hour on his motorcycle blindfolded.

Then you remember that your friend’s Amsterdam photos are taken on a post-divorce trip. And while you’d want to be aboard, you would not want to be going through a divorce. Or that you’d have never wanted to marry the guy she was with. When they were together, their relationship was the stuff of nightmares. Not dreams. You feel bad for feeling envious of that trip. You apologize silently and wish her the best of luck.

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Sometimes boring is good. It’s better than catastrophe. It gives you time to collect on what’s happened, and what you want to happen. It teaches you to procrastinate less when you are healthy because you have only so much time when things are going your way.

You also remember that while you might be going through a rut, your life hasn’t been boring. You wish you had less drama. But hey, you already suffered an education system that treated you like a racehorse and made medical mistakes to continue the race.

You suffered, but not without getting some trophies and learning your lessons. You were never going to live by somebody else’s rules again as much as you could possibly help it.

That’s why you are freelancing. Because even when it seems like a rut, things are still more exciting than they could ever be if you held a job that went against your very nature.

Even boring is good, when you get to call most of the shots.

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Watch Nerve. Read Olga’s post. Dare to do something different. But don’t mistake your temporary rut with other people’s lifelong ones.

Write on! (This post contains an affiliate link.)

 

 

Sleepy Writer’s Wake-up Ritual: How to Start A Writing Day Well

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Image via pictures88.com
Image via pictures88.com

 

Whether it is the current assignment, your new post, the kids or something else calling, there comes a time when we need to pull ourselves out of the bed, wash up and get ready for a hopefully fun battle that is a writer’s day.

It’s much harder to just respond to logic (“I need so much to do, and I can’t just wait for everything to be perfect to start my day!”) after a bad night’s sleep, when you have a cold or the weather is as bleak as in a post-apocalyptic movie.

It’s even harder if your body loves and/or needs a lot of sleep. Here’s all the weaponry I arm myself with to drag myself to my writing desk and chair: (Because I can’t be happier once I start writing away.)

 

Make sure you’ve slept enough!

sleepy-writer
Image via fantasy-fiction.com.

 

I envy the lucky souls who only need 5-6 of sleep to start the day with full energy and working brain cells. I however belong to the majority that needs 7-9 hours.

Hell, I need much closer to 9. Whatever your magic number is, make sure you get your fill. Because even though you exercise and eat healthily to make up for the lack of sleep, tiredness and lack of productivity will creep up on you no matter how many cups of coffee you drown, and we both know losing count of how much caffeine you take is only good for sitcom characters.

 

    Choose a Kick-ass Alarm Song

Michael J. Fox as Marty McFly, Back to the Future
Michael J. Fox as Marty McFly in Back to the Future, rocking the night away. Image via 8tracks.com.

 

Sometimes an early meeting, a late night out with friends or just some appreciated after-midnight inspiration doesn’t allow you to wake up all energized. You need some motivational intervention to kick your body and soul into motion

And even if you wake up all energized, extra vigor and flare never hurt anyone.  Now, I hate the typical beeping sound. So I set my alarm clock (aka my cell phone) to play a rocking tune (currently it’s Where the River Flows by Collective Soul) to let me know morning has arrived.

If you need any suggestions (these songs also are great for picking up pace for your stories, finding motivation, typing faster and boosting up your confidence before you send that pitch.):

Roxette- Dressed for Success – She’s Got the Look

Bon Jovi – Everyday

Soundgarden – Original Fire

Exercise

Ideally for 30 minutes, to equally vitalizing music. I prefer dancing, aerobics or a combination of both. Don’t forget to stretch before and after.

Even when you don’t have time, pick some good basics and do them anyway. 5-10 minutes is better than nothing.

 

Shower  

Save the foamy, relaxing bath for later. Now you just want to feel fresh and awake.

 

Have a Healthy Breakfast

That, under no circumstances and in no universe, means black coffee on empty stomach! A whole-grain toast with some healthy cheese beats a bowl of cornflakes. Add some healthy yoghurt, some freshly squeezed juice to the mix if you can and you are good to go.

Yes, your nutritionist will know better. You know your body better than me too. But we both now a candy bar is not what you need. (Yes, I love those too. Life is just not fair.)

 

Make Sure Your Desk Beckons You

It’s your working environment, so how much you organize (if at all) and how you decorate is up to you. Take 5-10 minutes to create your ideal space, but don’t use it as a reason to procrastinate.

 

Type the Words Away

You made it! Happy Writing.

 

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This is my favorite ritual, and things go a lot for better for my spirits (and writing) if I stick to it. Of course this is for a typical morning. If the weather is too hot to bear, this is the post you should check out: Productivity for Writers: Tips to Increase Your Productivity During Hot Weather

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