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Writing Humor That Cracks You Up 1: Poking Fun at Oneself Unashamedly

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Kevin Bacon: What was your favorite Kevin Bacon performance?

Will (Eric McCormack): I loved you in Footloose.

Kevin (happy/surprised): You saw that?

Will & Grace, Season 5, Episode 2

Image via guardian.co.uk.
Image via guardian.co.uk.

Humor is relative. What makes me laugh won’t necessarily make you laugh, and vice versa. It’s why hardcore fans of How I Met Your Mother may not enjoy Friends just as much, and hardcore Friends fans may not be crazy about How I Met Your Mother. I belong to the latter group, for example.

While ratings hit The Big Bang Theory can put a smile on my face, it never cracks me up-which is what I expect from a sitcom. So if it is on during dinner and nothing else is on, I don’t mind watching it. But if I want to laugh, I’d rather watch any episode of Married with Children (8th season excluded) or Coupling (4th season excluded) again rather than watching a new one from Community or Rules of Engagement.

There is not one type of successful sense of humor, and various hit comedies of highly different style and story lines are testimonials to that.

Why Making Yourself Laugh Matters

The good news? Whatever successful comedy you love watching or reading, there’s a big audience who shares a similar sense of humor. And if you can genuinely make yourself laugh with your material, there’s a chance you can make a lot of others laugh too.

Now, I say successful comedy, because you want agents/publishers/producers/networks to like your script/story/book, but you also need your work to be enjoyed and bought. So it is better to analyze a show with at least a modest record of ratings, or a book that has reached a certain sales level.

Of course you might be targeting a very specific group and you might be vehemently against anything that is considered mainstream. While that probably means you don’t share my kind of humor (which I’ll mention in more detail), you can still take something away from this post: the need to analyze your favorite works, finding their similarities and differences. And that’s a good starting point. I’m not saying you should limit yourself to formulas, but as expert writers in any area often point out, reinventing the wheel is a lot harder and riskier than copying a model that has been repeatedly successful. So this is what this series will cover.

Poking Fun at Oneself Unashamedly

This works best if/when you know the person/situation and you already find it funny or interesting. It also helps if you have thought about it yourself.

Now, if the material and its makers might do a very good job of portraying things so that you laugh or are at least entertained with no previous knowledge/thought about it. But I almost always find it that the person who’s familiar does laugh more.

Some of my favorite self-directed humor examples are below.

1)      SNL featuring Gerard Butler, Jon Bon Jovi & Dermot Mulroney

I realized that the humor of writers of Saturday Night Live is most often lost on me if they are tackling things that are not my cup of tea or situations I’m not interested and/or don’t know about.

But some SNL stints have taken perfectly good facts, added some twisted humor and had the celebrity spoof himself. Those are the ones that appeal to me, crack me up, get me to record and rewatch.

 

–          Gerard Butler, 300, Gay Men and SNL

 

SATURDAY NIGHT LIVE- gerard butler-snl
Gerard Butler’s SNL Leonidas is trying to convince his soldiers to delay “coming out” until the war is over. It’s not like any of them is gay, right? Truth? None of them are straight!! : )

 

Gerard Butler is one talented Scotsman. He is diverse, and has proven himself in many genres. Yes, people won’t be comparing him to Marlon Brando or Gary Oldman any time soon, but it takes guts, talent and hard work to pull off action, indie dramas, a powerful shot, several accents, an opera, thriller, comedy, romantic comedy and epic.

Butler is one of my favorite actors & entertainers because he picks scripts that draw me to them. The list of Butler movies that I didn’t care about (e.g. 300, The Phantom of the Opera, Beuwolf and Grendel), is a lot shorter than the ones I liked.

His interviews are also a lot of fun because he’s a good story-teller and doesn’t mind making fun of himself.  So that’s one of the reasons his SNL hosting and stints work: it is not just the writers. It’s the guy.

 

SNL writers+ Butler’s skills+ his CV+ nationality=hilarity

 

Sure, some stints weren’t that funny, but I dare you to watch his 300, Braveheart, Scottish-American translated news and opening act and not to laugh out loud at least a couple of times.

He opens by categorizing his movies into 2: action films where he takes his shirt off (e.g. Lara Croft, 300) and sensitive dramas where he keeps his shirt on (i.e. The Phantom of the Opera). Sure, it is generalized and exaggerated, but that’s the fun of it. Ninjas and Romans and Vikings attack him while he fights them off and sings opera at the same time.

 

Leonidas: 40% of Sparta considers homosexuality an illness.

A soldier: 40% of Sparta doesn’t believe you were born in Greece!

Leonidas: (takes out a big stone tablet that his name is carved on) I have a birth certificate!!

300 Spoof, SNL

 

In  the 300 spoof all the actors have worn metal muscle-shaped plates so that they can fake the 300 bodies. And all the soldiers are gay, as opposed to the 300’s heterosexual men who call Persians boy-lovers. Of course it’s not just 300 being spoofed…

The translation. His Scottish accent is clear, but you need to see Seth Meyers translating while Butler speaks with a very heavy accent that “forces” Meyers to add creativity and interpretation to his translation.

 And last but not least, the Braveheart number. Now, Braveheart is my favorite movie. Ever. But the way it is spoofed gave me stomach cramps.Gerard Butler may not be spoofing himself, but he is spoofing a hit movie that tells a piece of Scottish history and Butler being Scottish, and having starred in some epic flicks himself, I couldn’t not mention it.

If you have seen Braveheart, you might remember William Wallace’s (Mel Gibson) incredibly inspiring speech that turned unwilling peasants into the most motivated soldiers. But when you create a brother who’s afraid of his shadow, and have him try to persuade very willing soldiers to run, you form the basis of some very funny moments;especially if the soldiers are the ones refuting the brother’s suggestions with Wallace’s lines:

SOLDIER: How can we surrender? The English deflower our virgin brides on their wedding nights!

DAVE (Gerard Butler): Well, first of all none of your wives were virgins on their wedding nights. There are six girls in our village and like a hundred guys…So no one is a virgin.

 

 

–          Jon Bon Jovi, Bon Jovi and Rocknroll vs. Acting

 Jon Bon Jovi is the front man of the rock band Bon Jovi-which has lead to confusion among non-fans ever since the band was formed. It has also lead a lot of people to think that Jon Bon Jovi is an egoistic jack***.

Then there is his acting credits that have impressed critics but not the box office. And of course the fans are divided into two groups 1) that will follow Jon’s work even if it’s not about music 2) that are adamant singers should stick to singing.

And then there’s the famous song lyrics, hair and fashion of the 80s, and Jon Bon Jovi not having aged badly.

So you start with a pre-credits stint where Amy Poehler is an unhappy teenager in 1986, and Jon on a poster of Slippery When Wet (the band’s 3rd album). When Amy poisons herself with too much hairspray, she hallucinates Jon, who gives her information about the future: musicians hosting SNL (that shocks her), Bon Jovi maintaining fame and success for decades, and Jon looking different only hair-wise.

jon bon jovi-amy poehler-snl
Jon Bon Jovi from 1986 is motivating the Amy Poehler from 1986. Courtesy of too much hairspray.

 

There’s the opening act where Jon informs the audience that he won’t be singing,resulting in several audience members (SNL actors) leaving. Who wants to see Jon act, right? Also rebelling is the band’s guitarist Richie Sambora who complains Jon not allowing the band to promote their album by not letting them perform for SNL.

Then there’s the Italian presenter who have taken Bon Jovi lyrics way too literally, resulting in an actual steel horse coming to the studio and Bon Jovi being the face of the cigarette brand “blaze of glory”.

And my absolute favorite where Jon and his band (SNL actors) are deciding on the band’s name and Jon drives everyone with his “Bon Jovi” idea, and him being the face of the group. In reality, Bon Jovi is the name suggested by a producer and the band agreed to that. And yes, there have been problems with Richie Sambora about him feeling like the second most important member even though he co-writes the songs, and this has resulted in the stint even the band members not knowing the name of the fifth member (Alec Jon Such who later left the band.)

 

–          Dermot Mulroney vs. Dylan McDermott

A gameshow host presents 3 contestants with a tremendous challenge: look at the pictures of Dylan McDermott and Dermot Mulroney and deciding which one is which. It doesn’t have their movie names/roles have similarities.

Now while I can separate them very easily, having enjoyed several works of both, they do have some similarities all right: both Americans, both born in the early 60s, both divorced, both university grads, both having shared some co-stars…And even McDermott has mentioned that people confuse the two (although I think they are nothing alike in the looks department as opposed to Ethan Hawke and front man of Sugar Ray.)

 

Dylan McDermott-Dermot Mulroney-SNL
Dermot Mulroney holds a picture of Dylan McDermott, saying “This is a picture of my face. Who am I?” Image via technologytell.com.

So while we enjoy the contestants’ dilemma, something funnier happens:Mulroney himself comes in, holding a picture of McDermott and asks who he is. Then when he learns that he is Mulroney, he says that he has been sleeping with another man’s wife. You can watch the stint on Youtube.

 

2)      Kevin Bacon on Will & Grace

Sean Hayes-Eric McCormack-Kevin Bacon
Jack is furious at Bacon’s reaction to his “stalker.”

Although celebrities have been known to play themselves in (mostly) comedies and sitcom Will & Grace has a few examples of it (Jennifer Lopez, Cher, Bacon), my favorite is Bacon.

The 6 degrees of separation theory using Bacon has been a popular topic around movie-goers. And with so many movies and co-stars, you can indeed get to a lot of celebrities in 5 people or less, should you start the network from Bacon.

Then you have his not-exactly-famous Bacon Brothers band with his brother, his cult hit musical Footlose (1984) and his youthful good looks with a body bordering on skinny, you have guaranteed some laughs. Add some good jokes from writers and great interpretations from Bacon and the characters  Will (Eric Mccormack) and Jack (Sean Hayes), you give the audience a blast.

The back story:

Will is a good-looking gay lawyer who can often be confused with being straight.

His best friend Jack is flamboyantly gay, and isn’t ashamed of his celebrity obsessions.

When the Bacon-stalking Jack lands the gig of being Bacon’s assistant and is told to catch the stalker, he presents an unfortunate Will to Kevin Bacon, who desperately tries to convince him that he’s not the stalker. When Bacon gets upset about even stalkers leaving him, Will needs to convince him that he’s still awesome. You can catch the full episode in the 5th season (episode 2: Bacon and eggs.)

Below are my favorite parts:

 Bacon: When the stalkers leave, it’s the first sign that your career is slipping. It’s a little tip that I picked up from Val Kilmer.

 Will: You did a movie with Val Kilmer?

 Bacon: No. But Val is in Top Gun with Tom Cruise and Tom was in A Few Good Men with me. Huh- that was a short one.

 Will: Your fans are never gonna leave you. You’re a great actor. You’re looking good, your hair is working, you’ve got the waist of a 14-year-old girl… I mean look at that (touching his waist), that’s crazy.

Kevin: (happy): Stop! What was your favorite Kevin Bacon performance?

Will: I don’t know,  loved you in Footloose.

Kevin (happy): You saw that?

And when Kevin wants to make up for his accusation after learning the truth, they dance together to Footloose’s music (which is available at the sound of a clap) and they some of Bacon’s famous moves…

Eric McCormack-Kevin Bacon-Will & Grace
Eric McCormack and Kevin Bacon busting some moves from Footloose. Image via tumblr.

 

3)      Jim Carrey on comedians on Liar Liar

When Jim Carrey’s lying lawyer character can’t lie for 24 hours due to his neglected young son’s birthday wish coming true, he’s forced to tell the truth no matter what. So his son tries to find out the truth of a lot of things, including whether his mouth will be stuck in downwards pout if he keeps doing it a lot. His father tells him that it won’t.

Jim Carrey-Liar Liar
The scene in question. Image via reinspired.wordpress.com.

Max:If I keep making this face… will it get stuck that way?
Fletcher (Jim Carrey): Uh uh. As a matter of fact, some people make a very good living that way.

 

4)      Dawson’s Creek-centered jokes on Don’t Trust The B in Apartment 23

 

Dawson's Creek Cast
Dawson’s Creek cast from left: Michelle Willams, James Van Der Beek, Joshua Jackson and Katie Holmes.

 

One of the most entertaining examples of an actor spoofing himself and his career has to be James Van Der Beek in Don’t Trust the B*** in Apartment 23.

If you have seen Dawson’s Creek when it came out in 1998, and especially if you were among the target audience (high school student, romantic, dreamy), you were probably aware of the show’s and the cast’s popularity; whether you liked the show or not.

Playing Dawson was James Van Der Beek who portrayed the romantic, aspiring screenwriter/filmmaker trying to survive high school through his relationship with best friend/soul mate Joey (Katie Holmes), best friend Pacey (Joshua Jackson) and his crush for the new girl Jennifer (Michelle Williams).

You might have noticed that Dawson’s Creek’s 3 other main characters are more popular than Beek, whether be it due to romantic relationships, a cult hit TV show or a pretty solid movie career. Yet during Creek, Van Der Beek was the most popular. And yes, I was a fan of the show (until it turned all soapy), having been a romantic, dreamy aspiring screenwriter teenager at the time. But I don’t think I would have a clue who he was, had it not been for Dawson’s Creek.

Our fictional James is over-the-top, but  what makes it funny is the truth about what happened to his career and how to most people, he is and always will be Dawson.

This catches up with him even when he’s trying to teach a serious drama class. He’s trying to convince everyone that he’s Shakespeareworthy but everyone just wants to hear his romantic speeches to Joey from Dawson’s Creek.

But the show’s humor also derives from the fact that as much as many actors complain about their one-hit-wonders and them being underrated because of it, they don’t mind cashing in on the money and popularity when it comes to enjoying their celebrity status.

 

***

Does this kind of humor make you laugh? Did you feel the need to check out Episodes because Matt LeBlanc was playing an over-the-top version of himself and spoofing his career and life after being Joey in Friends for 10 years?

Do  you find Rick Gervais the funniest when he makes fun of himself, before moving on to make a lot of jokes on controversial topics?

What cracks you up?

When It’s OK to Use Cliches in Your Writing: Hidden Metaphors – Poison’s Bret Michaels Style

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Writers are often advised to avoid cliches like the plague. Oops, I used a cliche even in my first sentence, didn’t I?

The “avoid cliches” advice is everywhere, and it in itself has become a cliche. And let’s face it, it is a part of the word’s definition- a cliche is commonplace- mostly because it makes a lot of sense. I mean you do have to avoid a plague after all.

Yet sometimes, it is just fun (and actually good) to use them, as long as you are aware why and how you are using them. I’ll continue to share my other favorite cliches in both mine and others’ storytelling in the upcoming posts and today I’m starting with a popular song from the 80s: Poison’s Every Rose Has Its Thorn.

Bret Michaels, Poison
Bret Michaels of Poison. Can you smell the 80s? 🙂 Image via naturesjyny.com

Poison is one of my favorite rock bands. They have my 3 requirements to adore a band: great vocals, relatable/fun lyrics and catchy music.

Yes, there are a lot of cliches about a (hair) rock band. They are in their names, attitudes, videos, personal lives and themes. You can’t be a rock band without some songs about sex, partying, drugs, booze, love and relationships.

But sometimes, an apparent cliche in a romantic ballad is a hidden metaphor.

When I first heard this song, I liked it, thinking it was a sad song about a guy (Bret Michaels, the leading singer) trying to get over the demise of his relationship. He didn’t want it to end, but even good things end. And nothing is perfect, right? Hence, the girl/relationship being the rose and her/its flaws being the thorn.

You can check out the lyrics here.

So sweet and yet, so typical.

But then I read Bret Michaels’s commentary on the song where he explains that while the song is based on Bret’s relationship that ended, the rose doesn’t represent the girl.

The girl left her for another guy with more money, but Bret was sure he’d make it. And guess what? His career is the rose, and the girl is the thorn. I hadn’t seen that one coming, and it made me like the song even more.

Now every time I listen to the song, I listen with a grin on my face.

I’d say he used a cliche well. What do you think?

 

A Writer’s Dream: Mary Bryant – More Story Conflicts Than You Can Handle

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The Incredible Journey of Mary Bryant starring Alex O' Loughlin, Romola Garai and Jack Davenport.
The Incredible Journey of Mary Bryant starring Alex O’ Loughlin, Romola Garai and Jack Davenport. Image via edbaran.com

A challenging conflict is in the heart of the story. We feel lucky when a big, potentially devastating, infuriating, seemingly impossible-to-get-out-of-conflicts is the reply to our most helpful question: “what if…” It is up to us to challenge the protagonist(s), excite readers/viewers and have their eyes glued to the medium of their choice. For instance:

“What if your little daughter accuses your best friend of sexual abuse? What if she is right? But what if he is innocent?”Read more about the conflict from the movie award-winning (Best Actor, Cannes) The Hunt.

Before I move on to Mary Bryant, Please note that I give a more detailed description of the plot and include great scenes and quotes in my Mary Bryant review on my movies blog. It is also a less spoiled version of the story. Here, I’ll list from the less spoiling conflicts to the most spoiling ones. So you might not want to analyze Mary Bryant’s conflicts with me if you haven’t seen the show.

Also remember that while it is based on a true story, some conflicts may be writer Peter Berry’s additions. But fictional or real, I was amazed by every single one.

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TV mini-series (The Incredible Journey of) Mary Bryant is based on the real life of the English convict Mary Broad (who became Mary Bryant through marriage) who was sent to Australia  (in the 18th century) as a part of her sentence to work as a laborer as the English soldiers saw fit.

Now, in theory, King George is being generous. Instead of hanging criminals, he is sending them off to a far away land where they’ll work and redeem themselves. In truth, their “redemption” starts with a 9-month boat trip where they are treated like animals. There’s no distinction of treatment when it comes to the crime. It didn’t matter you were stealing to not to starve (like Mary), or smuggling some booze along your fish (like Will). You were treated the same with rapists and mass murderers. In the soldiers’ eyes the women are a distraction for the men, and they are seen as whores anyway.

Now, Mary (played by Romola Garai) might be poor, but she is smart, determined and dedicated. And unfortunately, she is pregnant. She thinks that maybe, if Lieutenant Clarke, likes her, her life will be easier. After all, he seems nicer, more humane and well…let’s face it…getting on the good side of a handsome soldier (compliments of the English actor Jack Davenport) seems a lot better than traveling in a cage, starving and gagging. And she has a baby to think of.

She unintentionally gets her chance when she almost drowns and fellow prisoner Will (played by Alex O’Loughlin) saves her life. But it is Clarke that carries her up and gives her a place to rest. He knows that she only stole for staying alive, and believes she’s truly redeemable. Oh and he’s smitten by her beauty. It goes well for a while. He’s not attacking her, she is clean and full and getting lessons. And she shares her food with her friend.

Problems start when he notices she is pregnant and she turns from potential lady material to “whore” in his eyes. Now, Clarke doesn’t immediately punish her. But he does push her away with initial disgust, and goes as far as to have her friend whipped because she openly disobeyed him.

Conflict 1: Your Principles/Values vs. Comfort/Chance for a Better Life

Door Number 1: Explain the situation to the guy. Maybe you were raped. Maybe a guy promised you marriage, you were young and foolish and it was hardly your fault. Maybe you thought you married him but he turned out to be a conman. Whatever. Lie or truth, pregnancy can happen for a lot of reasons, and it can be explained to a guy who, when calm, seems to believe you. Now, remember, this is Mary’s situation in the 18th century, as a convict, on a boat. Not yours.

Door Number 2: You leave his quarters immediately. He is a self-righteous jerk who’s only slightly better than the rest of the soldiers, and he is a part of the system. Almost all women on the ship are whore in his eyes, and he had her friend whipped so badly, that it is a miracle she made it in those horrible conditions.

Mary chooses number 2. She might be a thief, and on the search for a better life for her baby, but she’s loyal to her friend, and her humanity. And she sees the lieutenant for who he is- and this creates the grounds for the other conflicts about to come.

*

After she goes back, she treats Will better, and realizes that he is just a nice guy who probably didn’t really hurt anyone.

After they arrive, the rules are established by the Governor travelling with them. Men are to stay away from the tents. Not that Will listens. But Mary isn’t about to act like a hormonal teen. She has a baby, and things are complicated enough. But she likes Will, and soldiers will probably be more understanding if they are serious.

Will gets on board, and together they land a fishing deal from the Governor. Will has the skill, and they get to be paid a portion of the catch. And married couples can build houses and live there as opposed to tents, so they get married it. They are crazy about each other anyway.

It turns out to be the right call for many reasons, to the resentment of Clarke. They make friends with others, start a family, have another kid and live in not-so-horrible conditions, given that they were prisoners about to be hanged.

But their happiness is short-lived. England isn’t that happy with the colony results, and food is in short supply. Clarke announces that Will won’t have his share of the fish from now on. With 2 kids to feed and people dying out of hunger and fatigue and diseases, Mary decides that they have to escape. They have the people they can trust, but they need the bigger boat of the soldiers. Problem? They need to store food, which they need to steal from storage whose key doesn’t leave Clarke’s side.

Conflict 2: Your family’s survival vs. Sleeping with a Man You Despise 

(while being married to guy you love.)

Door Number 1: You take your children and go to Clarke. You ask for his help. Your children are starving, and you realized that Will wasn’t great husband material after all. Clarke is more than happy that you saw sense. That you chose him.

Of course this is a ploy to keep him distracted, and while you fake emotions, you can’t fake the sex. And your husband knows. And he has to agree. He can’t risk his kids dying of hunger, can he?

Naturally Will’s situation is a great conflict too. He can’t stop his wife, even though he wants to. He doesn’t want to agree, but he has to. Knowing his wife is sleeping with another guy, a guy that he despises is extremely hard. But watching his children die….that’d be much harder.

Door Number 2: She doesn’t go to Clarke. They all die, sooner or later. Along with their children, knowing they haven’t done everything they could.

It’s horrible, but it is a no-brainer. Will and Mary choose option 1.

*

Since all the door number 2s in the conflicts will also cause death, I’ll just provide the conflict and the characters’ choices from now on.

Conflict 3: Risking Escape vs. Involving Dangerous Men You Don’t Trust

The last thing Will and Mary need is to have 2 men on the board they despise, but they don’t have a choice. They’ll be exposed or hurt. They came too far to give up. So they include the men. Who don’t like the idea of having a woman on board. Who believe women are there to have sex with. Who don’t like the idea of kids on board. Luckily for Mary and Will, they need Will to sail and Will isn’t going anywhere without his family.

Conflict 4: Leaving a Loyal Friend Behind vs. Getting Everyone Else Killed

When the soldiers catch up with them on land close to the colony, and Sam can’t catch up with the rest, they have to risk capture or death. Now some want to go back. Will can’t openly leave him behind. Even Martin (one of the men they don’t trust) doesn’t want to leave him behind. Not that Marry wants to, but again, she puts her family’s survival above all, and she leads the boat away.

*

Things seem easier to deal with once they reach their destination. 2 men short, but alive. They convince the Dutch about them being English people who lost their boats and crew, and they start leading a luxury life – a temporary one that will last until the Dutch can arrange a boat to take them home.

Everyone except Will is happy. He is unhappy about all the lying, and he is angry about everyone’s fascination with Mary. It even gets to the point that he suggests Mary stays here and lead a better life but Mary isn’t about to let him give up on them in a depressed state. They love each other, and she is with him by choice.

Conflict 5: Sacrificing Your Life vs. Giving Your Wife and Kids a Chance at Escape

This is not even a choice for a guy who loves his family, and Will isn’t about to let them killed after everything they have been through. When the English find them and their identities are exposed, Will sees that Mary and the kids are trapped. Instead of escaping, he grabs the attention of Clarke, giving them a chance at escape. He gets caught, and gets killed (though his last move was to plunge at Clarke with knives).

Unfortunately, the guys catch Mary and the kids anyway.  Back on their second 9-month boat trip, things are worse. Mary has lost Will, the kids die out of a disease they caught.

Conflict 6: Fighting with Your Last Breath vs. Giving Up

Back at home, waiting for the trial that’ll decide to hang them, Mary is despondent. The remaining 2 are hanging on to the hope that the society’s support might save them, if Mary made a heartfelt speech at court. Except, Mary has given up. Depressed and feeling guilty over losing her family…the reason she did everything for…

But at court, she says that she is not a hero. And she doesn’t mind being hanged. She lost everything. But she does defend her fellow mates- who better or worse- followed her decisions. Took the risks. Survived up to this point. And her speech, gets them off.

She wins against Clarke. And England. They part to resume their lives, though Mary is the one who has lost the most.

*

I might have skipped some, but these 6 are very compelling conflicts spread over several hours. The fact that most were real conflicts experienced in real lives make them all the more effective. They break your heart, and make you angry. But in the end you find yourself admiring Mary (and Will). You were rooting for them anyway, but as the stakes go higher and their choices get more difficult, the more engaged you get.

The protagonists go through hell again and again, making it impossible for the viewer to stop watching.

And as far as what I’d do if I were in Mary’s shoes…I think one of Will’s lines sums it up perfectly:

Will: I could never leave that boy behind. Not more than I could sleep with Ralph Clarke. But we got this far because you could. They all know it but none of them could say it.

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Want more conflicts? Try:

Most Enthralling Story Conflicts & Dilemmas: The Ledge – Kill Yourself or Your Loved One Will Be Killed

Your Daughter’s a Liar or Your Best Friend’s a Pervert: Most Enthralling Story Conflicts 2 – The Hunt

Ransom – You Just Killed Your Son or You Just Saved Him: Most Enthralling Story Conflicts 3

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19 Signs You’re Addicted to Writing

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addiction
Image via mynxwrites.blogspot.com


There should be W.A. meetings.

“Hi, my name is Pinar and I’m addicted to writing”.

Don’t get me wrong, I’m not trying to undermine any addictions here. But there are addictions that are not (all) bad. I’m quite fond of my addiction to rock music, movies and yes, writing- the oldest, strongest addiction of them all.

When I named my site, I wasn’t trying to be cute, but merely stating a fact.

I have always been addicted but I didn’t quite own up to it when I was writing the next Spider-Woman (yes, Spider-Woman) cartoon episode in my head.

I also didn’t suspect much when English became my favorite lesson at the age of 12, or that I found myself openly thrilled about “having to” do projects that included a lot of writing (much to the surprise or disdain of my fellow classmates.)

But then it became way too obvious for anyone to ignore. You want to know if you are addicted?

Take a look at the “signs” below and see if any of them rings true for you. And you should probably be trying your hand at a writing-related career if you have answered yes to at least some of these questions.

  • You are willingly taking on school projects that involve writing. Plays, stories, essays…You name it. You also find yourself enjoying all exams that require essays.
  • You get good at feigning interest in non-writing-related classes while you are just writing the next scene in your script. In your head. In your notebook. On the desk. Wherever.
  • You love an audience and you feel over the moon when people genuinely like what you wrote. But you’d not stop writing even if no one read or liked it.
  • You shock everyone when you willingly take an elective at university because it requires a thesis, not despite of it.
  • When you are alone, you have several voices having conversations in your head. No, you don’t suspect any sort of mental disorder. For one thing, you know they are not real. For second, they are not talking to you. They are talking for you-so that you can finally get scenes written the way you want them to be, or you get to envision new scenes.
  • You do find yourself occasionally tuning out of conversations when they get stale, or when your muse decides to show up. In your defense, a lot of people give breaks during conversations to check their messages or update their status or have an obsessive texting match with their boyfriends. You are just doing your bit for the creative world.
  • You fall in love with the Bryan Adams song “She’s only happy when she’s dancing” and create  a “She’s only happy when she is writing” version-though I should add that I’m addicted to dancing as well.
  • You read a great post/article/novel or see an awesome movie and think “Man, I wish I had written that”.
  • You are more impressed with actors if they have also churned out some really cool screenplays.
  • You favorite author tops the list of famous people you’d love to meet.
  • You can’t sleep because of all the ideas spinning around in your head.
  • So you get up, despite your closing eyelids, and start taking notes. I’m writing these words at 2.30 am. I went to bed at 2.
  • You do get incredibly excited about your ideas and share them with people-your imagination and inspiration are just exciting to you as your accomplishments.
  • You know that even after you turn off your computer after finishing a post late at night and going to bed, you probably won’t fall asleep for an hour or two because you’ll be thinking about other post ideas.
  • You just love writing. Especially when you are inspired, and have the freedom to write what you want.
  • The more you write about signs you are addicted to writing, more signs keep coming to your mind.

 

 

Are you addicted to writing? Are your symptoms similar to mine? What would you add to the list?

If you liked this post, you can follow this fellow addict @zoeyclark on Twitter.

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